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Wednesday, February 15, 2006

Valentine’s Day Reflections

Valentine’s Day is rarely fun for a single girl such as myself, but I had a surprisingly good Valentine’s yesterday. Some of my smiles stem from the realization that I may at last be over the train wreck relationship that was my first love, and to honor my first and only love on Valentine’s day, I listened to my “Thinking of Him” tape that I made after our breakup. That tape could make me cry rivers, but I didn’t feel any pain or negativity when I listened to it yesterday.

It’s amazing to me how the memories you associate with a song can change back and forth when you’re not looking. One song for example practically described word for word the things that made our relationship fall apart, but that song no longer represents heartache to me. Since I bought the cd in France while I was studying abroad, all I can visualize now is me walking down the narrow streets of Avignon, listening to music and admiring the scenery. I am so grateful that this song is no longer painful to listen and that it has magically spun itself back into a positive memory because it would be such a shame to have to avoid certain songs forever just because they remind me of him.

Although the realization that my wounds have healed is wonderfully exciting, I’d say the majority of my smiles from Valentine’s Day can be attributed to the kindness of three of my male friends who made me feel remarkably special with their attention and trinkets. It doesn’t even take much to make me happy, just a phone call or a visit, but sometimes I find that getting even that from of boyfriend is like pulling teeth. So imagine my surprise when three of my friends with no Valentine’s Day obligation to me, manage to pull off these favors without a second thought. I was moved because I’ve never really had a real Valentine’s Day experience, and when I come to think about it, I’ve missed out on practically every cliché romantic moment. I’ve never had a Valentine. I’ve never had a New Year’s kiss. I have never even kissed under the mistletoe, but I’m sure these moments will sneak up on me when I least expect them because just as I gave up on Valentine’s Day, I wound up having the most memorable one yet.

1 Comments:

At 8:56 PM, Blogger Jay Noel said...

Some people call Valentine's Day, "Single Awareness Day."

I'm glad you had a great Love Day nevertheless.

 

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