Temporary Insanity

As I expected, my happiness with Rocky had to end. Unfortunately, it ended in a very dramatic, Young and the Restless type of way.

New Year’s Eve at Ibiza, Rocky’s ex-wife was there, and I spent the entire night fearing that she might knock me out. Things were fine at first, but after I’d been dancing with Rocky for a while, she came up to him and started a very intense conversation. I just stepped out of the way and keep walking because I feared for my safety and because I wanted to be respectful of their relationship. It was clear that they had unfinished business to work out and I figured that they owed each other whatever closure they hadn’t accomplished already. Silly me, because as it turns out Rocky hasn’t been too separated from his wife during their so call “divorce” because they’ve been together intimately within the last two months and now she claims to be pregnant. It sounds like she wants Rocky back for obvious reasons with a child on the way, and believe me I’m only too happy to step aside and let her have him.

I even got a chance to talk quite extensively with his wife at the club and we exchanged numbers at the end of the night. Rocky warned me that she was violent, but I actually found the opposite to be true. She seemed like a perfectly rational woman, very intelligent, very well spoken and I have nothing but respect for her and how she handled the entire situation.

Rocky, on the other hand, has a lot of skeletons in his closet that he was never going to tell me about. He has a drinking problem, with at least one DUI in the past, he’s had at least one major depressive episode with a suicide attempt, and is a perpetual liar. I truly believe that Rocky’s feelings for me are true and that he can change for the better, but I think that I’ve been hurt enough by his reckless behavior. I’m getting out and I’m currently dealing with the awkward process of cutting him out of my life. Unfortunately, he is a lot more persistent than the Colombian and is not going to go quietly in the night. He called me at least seven times yesterday, shouting a dozen “I love you’s” and getting progressively drunker as the night wore on. For a split second of insanity, I was considering staying friends with Rocky, but it’s clear now that that’s going to be impossible. I have to cut all ties with Rocky, which means no more phone calls, no more pleasantries, and definitely no more dancing.

I’ll, of course, miss him because at least for a short while he made me a very happy woman. I had the time of my life with him, but I’m wise enough to know when I’m defeated, wise enough to know when to let go.